It is not uncommon to find men frustrated with their sex life at one point or another. In fact, the assumption that sex is a case of instant gratification is all but a myth. For some men, sex is really hard work and reaching orgasm is actually rare or almost unattainable. The number of men out there who can hold an erection or stop premature ejaculation are quite many. You might come to appreciate sex therapy once you realize that sex is not an automatic “hard on” and “guaranteed” climaxing.
In reality a lot of men desire to improve their sex life for the better. Fortunately, here are actionable secrets to achieving the glory of an active and satisfactory sex life.
1. Don’t bother with Porn
Men are misled at an early of what sex is about and what sex should be. The social programming of people in the modern society has destroyed the prospect of enjoying sex as they try to imitate what the society is selling them or making them think. If you have been trying to map what is shown in porn movies into your sex life, you are wasting your energy and eroding your self-esteem. To really enjoy sex and come to satisfaction, you need to be at ease and go after the pleasure and not the show off that you can dominate a woman or make her moan the loudest or orgasm faster in a record-time manner. Focus is great when you go with the natural flow of energy, chemistry and excitement of connecting with another person at an emotional level. In fact, emotional connection is the key to great sex and ultimate orgasmic release.
2. Focus on responding to Pleasure
Sex is comparable to reading to some extent. It is not all about the pounding action as if to demonstrate physical performance. Read you partners response to sensations and give them more of what turns them on and gets them excited. Do not stress yourself with what seems like what sex should be on porn. Comparing porn to your sex life is like comparing real life driving with a motor racing scene on a movie, which obviously is exaggerated and “staged” for entertainment.
3. Focus on your stamina
This is absurd. You cannot enjoy sex or reach orgasm without fully relaxing, building anticipation and going into foreplay. There is so much psychology that goes into having rewarding sex. You cannot just get in, taste the pleasure, and move out like you would do in a shop. You need to be stress free, present in the moment and fully eager of how your body will react to simulation. Physical presence is not all. You need your mind present too. To build sex stamina for sexual arousal, focus on your breathing and stay aware of it as much as you can. This will put you in control and allow you to slow or increase your pace until you orgasm.